I am Me. Part Three.

I am Me. Part Three.

After my boys grew older, I found myself on the move again. During this time I had before my next journey, I enrolled in various courses to expand my knowledge. I completed my Reiki masters, delved into crystal courses, resumed reading cards and offering readings to friends. I also pursued an Indian head massage course and completed dream analysis. Immersed in self-help books, I could instinctively sense a book, the ones that resonated with me, often knowing within the first few pages if I would peruse until the end.

Equipped with a plethora of new skills and experiences, I still felt profoundly lost. Despite completing courses and devouring insightful books, the emptiness lingered. Each new endeavor provided temporary fulfillment, but the profound questions about my true home and purpose in life persisted. Despite offering guidance to others, I struggled to fill the void within me. I was still Lost.

I sensed the need to move again, feeling that the place I was in no longer aligned with my growth. When a dear friend questioned my departure, I explained that it wasn't about the town or the people but about my personal evolution. The town had served its purpose, and it was time for me to continue the quest for my true home, uncertain if I'd find it in this lifetime.

With my then-partner, we embarked on a journey covering nearly 4000kms, settling in the Northern Territory. There, we operated a convenience store in the outback, servicing Aboriginal communities. The experience was enlightening, but the sense of home remained elusive.

Returning to Darwin, one of the hottest places on earth, I found a certain comfort, but it still wasn't the profound feeling of home. As my partner returned to our hometown, our paths diverged. Despite this, I secured a job in Darwin that became one of the best I've ever had. I cherished the camaraderie with colleagues and formed lasting connections.

Despite the job's merits, I couldn't shake the feeling that it wasn't my true home. Nevertheless, I felt a sense of ease in this environment, making friends and even having a favorite breakfast spot in Fannie Bay for over a decade. The staff at the cafe became like family, seeking readings and guidance from me, intertwining my spiritual work with a job I enjoyed.

However, toxic dynamics emerged when new operators joined the office. Working alongside these toxic individuals became increasingly challenging over two years. Eventually, I reached a breaking point, realizing I couldn't endure it any longer. In an ironic twist, I left a beloved position due to toxic coworkers. Though the company promised to address the issue, their process took time, and I had already made the decision to part ways. It took a while, but eventually, I blessed them, cut cords, and severed ties, ready for a new chapter in my journey.

After spending a few months in Darwin relishing freedom and introspective moments with my soul, I made the decision to head to Cairns in North Queensland. While on the way, I found myself sidetracked by circumstances that seemed almost unbelievable, leading me to a quaint place called Bramston Beach. There, I stumbled upon the only cafe in town, which happened to be for sale. After some consideration and a brief visit to Cairns, I decided to purchase the cafe, joined by an old schoolmate.

Initially, I questioned if this coastal spot could be my true home. The cafe brought me good times and introduced me to wonderful people, along with a mix of challenging encounters. I managed to weed out those with whom I didn't see eye to eye, focusing on maintaining positive energy. Alongside running the cafe, I continued to see spiritual clients, creating a harmonious blend of business and spiritual work.

Despite the contentment I found at Bramston Beach, that lingering empty feeling persisted. During this time, I befriended a woman from Thailand who worked for me and lived in my spare room. After she returned to Thailand, she suggested I visit her country, sensing that I might find it appealing.

As I neared the end of my three-year stint at the cafe, a traumatic event occurred. The cafe was broken into, and facing intruders threatening violence to shoot you was a harrowing experience. The aftermath left me on edge, struggling with fear, and feeling somewhat disappointed by the lack of support from police initially and family later, a consequence of the distance I had; I guess created over the years. Yet this was a turning point, and I decided it was time to move on.

Reflecting on the break-in later, I questioned my spirit family about the incident, as they had previously assured me of protection in this lifetime. Their response was clear: "Were you hurt?" When I answered in the negative, they emphasized that they fulfilled their promise of taking care of me. The break-in, they explained, was a catalyst to propel me out of a relentless work routine. Despite the initial shock, I came to understand that it was a nudge from the universe to set me on a new path.

After three years and a couple of months, I found myself boarding a plane bound for Chiang Mai, Thailand, leaving behind some of the most beautiful friendships I had ever encountered. These people felt like my tribe, and if I were to ever return to Australia, I knew I would want to live in the vicinity of these amazing souls.

Arriving in Thailand in the middle of the day, as I disembarked the plane and went through customs, a profound realization hit me – this is that home feeling. It was an overwhelming sensation, a calmness I had never experienced before. I felt at home. Could this be the end of my searching?

Now, after a year in Thailand, I still carry that feeling of home within me. However, not long after I arrived, while sitting alone at one of the breathtaking temples in Thailand, I had an epiphany. Messages from the spirit came to me, affirming that, yes, I had arrived at what I considered home, but it wasn't a place; it was within me. Home was my soul, and all along, I had it within me. I had embarked on various journeys, thinking I needed to find a physical home and place, not realizing that my soul was my true home. It was always about my soul – nurturing it, loving it, and finding peace and freedom within.

All the ups, downs, twists, and turns in my journey were part of my learning process. When I questioned my spirit guides about why they didn't reveal this earlier, they explained that I had much to learn and go through. My journey was filled with stories, experiences, broken promises, and using by others. Yet, my spirit guides and angels assured me that every trial and tribulation was for my growth, the path I needed to take.

Finally, here I am – free, at peace, and embracing the person I am. Regardless of where or how I live, it no longer matters because I've found my home within myself. Now, with a sense of freedom and peace, I am ready to offer my experiences to those who seek me out. If not, I'll continue living my life with authenticity, for I've discovered my true home in me.

In Love, Light and Blessings. 

 

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